This fall, three major clients of mine unexpectedly changed or reduced their leadership development plans, leaving me surprised and reeling with my own uncertainty. My patterned response (ego at work) would have been to do what I’ve always done: focus on what’s next, make a plan, then drive the plan. Move into action. The new pivot for me is to stay in the discomfort of the bardo instead—an undefined, liminal space.

I love how Francesa Fremantle describes bardo in her book Luminous Emptiness:

[Bardo] is an interval, a hiatus, a gap. It can act as a boundary that divides and separates, marking the end of one thing and the beginning of another; but it can also be a link between the two: it can serve as a bridge or a meeting place, which brings together and unites. It is a crossing, a stepping-stone, a transition. It is a crossroads, where one must choose which path to take, and it is a no-man’s-land, belonging neither to one side nor to the other. It is a highlight or peak point of experience, and at the same time a situation of extreme tension, caught between two opposites. It is an open space, filled with an atmosphere of suspension and uncertainty, neither this nor that. In such a state one may feel confused and frightened, or one may feel surprisingly liberated and open to new possibilities where anything might happen.

So, with the help of others, I am trying this new move. The go-getter in me is going quiet. Instead of “figuring things out” and going after them, I’m seeing what wants to be born. In concrete terms, my agreement with myself is to not initiate any new work until 2025. I’m going to keep my focus on what’s already in process and follow whatever organically shows up.

The Conscious Leadership Group describes this shift as moving from “Life By Me” to “Life Through Me.” If you’re curious, here’s a 4-minute video and a model.

Understanding bardo more deeply as a concept has been a good start for me, because words and frameworks help me make sense of the world. And, the practice of being in the bardo is uncomfortable; it doesn’t come nearly as easily as the cognitive understanding does. For all my fellow travelers who are also in a bardo of any magnitude, here’s to letting go and seeing what comes.